Korban Pesach (Passover Sacrifice): a new approach

For the last week I’ve been in Brooklyn, not as Rabbi but as Mom and Grandma, soothing my daughter’s fevered brow and taking care of Jonah while Dan went to work. Rachel rested and fought the fever, downing gallons of chicken soup and tea. Meanwhile, Jonah and I spent all his waking hours (and a good number of his sleeping hours) wrapped up in an almost uninterrupted hug. This is not to say that I never put him down, but that I stayed close, engaging in what I’ve come to call “the Zen of Grandma.” I sang nonsense songs or made up poems to turn the scary sirens and Brooklyn background sounds into rhyme and reason. (I tried reading, but at this point, Jonah “chews” his words and literally tries to devour books.) Over and over, I felt awed at the blessings surrounding us.

When Aaron and I skidded back into our snow-blanketed driveway and shoveled a path for the car, I was just about all-in. There was just enough energy left to read a most wonderful article in Friday’s New York Times. It said in scientific and sociological terms what we all have experienced: touching someone makes the person feel better, “A warm touch seems to set off the release of oxytocin, a hormone that helps create a sensation of trust, and to reduce levels of the stress hormone cortisol.” Benedict Carey, the author of the article, brought evidence from research into the effects of high-fives and hugs shared by high ranked and low ranked basketball teams and of simple handholding by couples interviewed about the rough times in their relationships. The facts bear out our own empirical findings. (One scientist suggested that humans are hard-wired to interpret someone’s supportive touch as a signal that the person is available to help share a problem solving load.) In truth, the scientific findings and our own feelings are prefigured in the Talmud, B’rachot 5b where three times we find the words, “Give me your hand. He gave him his hand and he raised him,” to describe the healing power of a compassionate touch. In each Talmudic example both the one touched and the one touching are affected by the contact. The rabbis also tell us that vis